Sunday, June 28, 2009

HAVE A NICE WALK!

Kids are so stupid, sometimes. I was driving the 18 going into downtown and was pulling up near 63rd and Nicollet. There was a group of about half a dozen kids. I'd guess they were from about 9 - 14 years old. They were about half a block from the bus stop and they started waving their arms wildly as they ran for the bus stop.

I pulled up alongside them, intending to stop where the first kid was (the furthest from the direction I was coming) so the others could just file in. As I pulled up to the first kid, one further back along the side of the bus yelled "Stop bitch!!" I stopped the bus, kept the door closed and looked through the side windows at the potty-mouthed boy. I kind of rolled my eyes and shook my head and pulled off. The kid couldn't have been much more than 10 years old. No way was I going to allow him to talk to me like that and then have him ride my bus...thus getting away with such disrespect.

After I pulled away, I called Control to let them know that I had passed up the group of kids and my reason why. They thanked me for letting them know and told them they'd pass that on to the bus behind me. WOO HOO!! Usually, that means that bus will pass them, too.

I hope they learned a lesson! If not, I hope they at least enjoyed their walk. ;)

CONTEST HINT

Okay, I'm getting tired of carrying these prizes around. It's getting too hot. Hmmmm...don't wanna just give you the route I'm on. That would be too easy.

Monday - Thursday I will be driving from northeast to south Minneapolis. Here's a BIG hint....I'll be going down the Nicollet Mall. Okay...I think I've said enough. I probably said too much. Oh well. We'll see.

Don't forget the winning phrase!!! Picking up strangers is fun!!

GUY LINES

Recently, I was doing the 18. It's always good for comedy.

A lady got on. She was nicely dressed and took a seat alone and obviously wanted it that way. Sure enough, the sharks started to circle. I couldn't believe it when I heard one guy go up to her and say the one line I always thought was soooooo stupid and an obvious attempt to find out if a woman is single. "Is your husband married?" The look on her face was as though she was reading my mind..."What a loser".

Not long after that idiot left, another guy and his friend started talking to her. The conversation started out innocent enough. What kind of work do you do? Do you live south? Then it got funny. The guy asked her if he gave her his address would she go over to his place and watch his bird. It was so bizarre, even his buddy tried to hide his laughter. The girl was pretty smart and turned him down nicely. I have to admit, that is a line I have never heard before!!

SNOOZIN' ON THE MALL

I was driving down Nicollet recently. I was stopped at a red light next to Daytons/Marshall Fields/Macy's or whatever the name of that store is this month. As I waited to cross 8Th street, I noticed a guy across the intersection sitting on the curb ahead with a large duffel bag at his feet. It looked like he was waiting for a parade. As I watched, he pushed the bag with his feet until it was almost to the double yellow line in the middle of the street. Then he crawled off the curb and laid down with his head on the bag like it was a pillow. Luckily, I had watched all this. He was dressed in all dark clothing and the bag was dark. It was dark outside and, even with the lighting on the mall, he was hard to see.

I carefully drove around him to get to the next bus stop. I decided I better call Control and have them get someone to get this guy out of the street before a cab came around the corner and ran him over or something.

I like the Mall, but it's not THAT homey! Then again, maybe I don't know what I'm missing. Guess I'll have to grab my pillow one night and go check it out!

SUMMER SMELLS

I love summertime. We suffer through long winters here in Minnesota just to enjoy a few months of warmth. However, along with the summer heat come the summer smells. On the bus, these can get gut wrenching.

I had this woman get on my bus recently. No joke. I could smell her before I even had a chance to greet her. She stunk BAD!! Unless there is a new cologne out there called "eau de ass", she really needed a bath.

The drunks stench goes up a notch, too. That fruity smell of cheap wine is enough to make me gag. It smells like they threw up on themselves, brushed it off and continued on with their day.

If you take a bus, do everyone a favor and make sure you don't stink! Treat other peoples' noses the way you want them to treat yours.

Thank you...this has been a public service announcement...for real!

I LOVE FIREMEN

I was driving down Nicollet Mall recently. There was a little boy about, 4 years old, walking with who I'm guessing were his parents and some other people. There was a fire truck right ahead of me. The little boy heard the truck and turned to look. His eyes lit up an you could tell he was excited just to see one so close to him. The firefighters noticed him and stopped the truck. They called him over and let him stand on the truck. They blew the horn and made a quick tap on the siren. The little boy was in heaven. There were people stopping to take pictures. The parents got theirs, too. It was really cute.

As the little boy walked away and waved at the firefighters, they called him back again. They gave him some stickers. This was like giving the kid a bar of gold. He was overjoyed. He waved again as the truck slowly pulled away with all the grown men waving back at the kid.

Usually, I get mad when I am forced to miss a stoplight or two. This was worth it. It was fun to watch. These guys took a couple minutes out of their day to give a kid something he will remember for years.

By the way, I know there are women firefighters...but this truck happened to be all guys. I just am avoiding comments from those out there that want to point out that I forgot the women that fight fires. They are appreciated too, but the guys are more "hot" to me!!
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